Be prepared for disasters.

I know it’s cool to pretend you’ve invincible, but you need to be prepared for disasters.  All your friends are like “Whatever, why are people freaking out and buying up all the toilet paper?”  I’m not totally sure on the toilet paper, but I can tell you why the stores are packed and some shelves bare: because it’s better to be prepared and have nothing happen, than to be unprepared and be without power/water/whatever for days.

This disaster-preparedness post is very hurricane-related, as that’s what I grew up dealing with.  We get them out here on the east coast, too, as evidenced by hurricane Irene whipping stuff around outside my window.  This advice is a little late for this one, but I hope it comes in handy in the future.

Here’s a (basic, non-exhaustive) list of some things you should have, and places to get these things.  At the end of this post is links to lists of stuff organizations like the Red Cross think you should have.

From LL Bean or REI (REI Outlet, even!):

• Flashlights or lanterns – Make sure you have batteries to go with them, and keep some extras on hand.  There are also models that you can charge with a hand crank, or solar power.
• Emergency weather radio – Get one that receives NOAA weather radio stations.  Again, remember batteries.

From Target, or your drugstore of choice:

• First aid kit.  And know what the stuff inside it is, and how to use it.
• Batteries.  Did I mention you need batteries, and should have extra on hand?  Because you really, really should.  Seriously, check your flashlights and radio, see what size batteries power them, and stock up.
• Prescription meds and/or medical supplies, if you need them.  A week’s worth.

From your favorite place to get foodstuffs:

• Water.  Enough for at least three days, and up to two weeks’ worth.  You should have at least a gallon per person for at least three days.  You don’t necessarily have to buy it; you can also fill up empty bottles and plastic baggies.  Keep these in your freezer to help preserve your food for as long as possible in case of a power outage.
• Non-perishable foods.  Again, enough for at least three days, and up to two weeks’ worth.  Think breads, crackers, muffins, instant oatmeal, granola.  Canned fruits (applesauce!) and veggies.  Canned tuna, ham or sardines if you eat meat.  Canned soup, preferably non-condensed so you don’t have to use any of your precious water on it.  And of course, fresh fruits and veggies that don’t need refrigeration.

Do this to prepare:

• Fill your tub with water.  This is for flushing, if your water stops working.
• Tape your windows if the winds are really strong.  Use duct tape to make Xs on your windows.
• Bring patio furniture, lawn decorations, etc. inside, or batten it down.  Remember, hurricanes are storms with very strong winds, and very strong winds pick things up and hurl them through the air, and maybe through your window.
• Charge your cell phone.

And then there are online resources, posted by people who really know their stuff. For more information:

• Red Cross hurricane preparedness checklist
• FEMA disaster preparedness info
• Eating during hurricanes
• Posts at Apartment Therapy’s the kitchn on cooking during hurricanes

It’s better to be able to flush your toilet and see in the dark if the utilities go out than it is to be too cool for disaster prep.

You aren’t bad at stuff, just unpracticed.

Okay, so your painting doesn’t quite resemble the vase of flowers before you, the composition of your photo is a little awkward, or your writing’s a little choppy.  It doesn’t mean you’re bad — you’re just unpracticed.  Don’t take it as a reflection of your inherent ability, or lack thereof.  Maybe Ira Glass explains it best:

“Nobody tells this to people who are beginners, I wish someone told me. All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap. For the first couple years you make stuff, it’s just not that good. It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you. A lot of people never get past this phase, they quit. Most people I know who do interesting, creative work went through years of this. We know our work doesn’t have this special thing that we want it to have. We all go through this. And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase, you gotta know its normal and the most important thing you can do is do a lot of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you will finish one story. It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions. And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met. It’s gonna take awhile. It’s normal to take awhile. You’ve just gotta fight your way through.”

So try and fail.  Try and fail.  Continue to try and fail.  Then, one day, try and succeed.  That’s just how it goes with most things, most of the time.

Pleasant > Brilliant.

Don’t worry about being brilliant; just be pleasant.  People don’t meet you hoping you’ll be a genius.  They are really just hoping they’ll enjoy being around you.

A college friend once confided to me that she’s very sharp, but she’s smart enough not to let everyone know it.  Your intelligence will show in the way you carry yourself.  You don’t need to make a point of showing how bright you are.  It can come across as condescending, and condescension is not cute.  Being nice will get you further than being right.  And being right will count more when you are nice, because people will like you enough to listen to you.

Toot your own horn.

People won’t know how awesome you are if you don’t let them know.  You aren’t being deep by sitting in your room scribbling away in a journal that nobody understands your genius.  You’re being stubborn and resistant.  And you’re probably acting (or not acting) out of fear.

Letting people know that you’re talented and interesting is not about bragging.  It’s about showing how you can participate in a way that makes the world a better place.  “Self-promotion” sounds like an obnoxious thing to do, but there are smart ways to do it.

Smart way:  Let people know what you’re up to, and share your passions with others.  Give them space to do the same, and be interested/happy to hear about their successes.

Smart way:  Keep your boss updated on things you accomplish.  Highlight how your work is making your boss’s work easier and increasing the effectiveness of your project.

Smart way:  Identify other people’s strengths and help them find new ways to use these skills.

You don’t have to be a braggart to be good at promoting yourself.  All you have to do is share yourself.  Self-promotion is a way to maximize your opportunities for making the world a better place.  And the best sort of self-promotion makes other people look good, too.

Do your hair and pluck your brows.

For goodness’ sake, do your hair and pluck your brows.

When you see a woman whose hair and brows are ungroomed, you probably think “she does not give a shit.”  When your hair and brows are ungroomed, people don’t magically think something different, like “That girl is liberated from the demands that society places upon women to be beautiful all the time.  She is too busy and important to be bothered.”  Rather, they think, “she does not give a shit.”

And when people think “she does not give a shit,” it extends beyond just your appearance.  They think you don’t care about your looks, or probably your job.  To them, you are a generally sloppy person.  They will not ask you to help them do anything that has to do with image or presentation, because you seem to have poor taste.  You will be overlooked and you may think it’s unfair, but it’s not.

We all have the option to present ourselves well.  If anything, you are being unfair to yourself.  So do yourself a favor and look a little nice for the world.  The cost of a hairbrush, bobby pins, and tweezer are well worth it.

Quit your job.

If you hate your job so much that thinking about going in to work ties your tummy into knots, quit. If you spend your breaks crying in the bathroom, or have checked out, and are worried you will be fired, quit. These are not ways to feel or act at your job. So quit. It will feel so empowering and it will make you happy.

You don’t understand! you are probably whining. Jobs are scarce, the economy is bad, I should be grateful to have a job! You’re wrong. I do understand, and jobs are not as scarce as you think they are, and you do not have to feel grateful about being in a place that makes you feel dead inside.

I was once fired from a job. I deserved it. I dragged my feet on projects, I said inappropriate things, and I barely participated in meetings. I spent a lot of time worrying, “All this stuff I’m doing, or not doing, will get me fired one day.”

And then it did. And instead of crying, or hating myself, or jumping in front of a bus, I did a happy dance. I called my friends and bragged to them that I did not have to put up with unhappiness any longer. I went home, made a cup of tea, sat on my balcony and smiled. Eventually, I got some gigs through a temp agency. When I wasn’t temping, I went to free or cheap community yoga classes. I signed up for an improv class. Almost four years later, I am now teaching yoga and improv.  And I do not waste too much time doing things that make me feel worthless.  Because life is too short, and we all have something we love to do that makes the world a better place.

If you’re unhappy at work, and your job makes you feel dead inside, quit.  Then find a way to be useful to the world.

(Update, 4/11/11: Freakonomics agrees!)

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